How Childhood Experiences Shape Mental Health and What You Can Do About It
Our childhood experiences can play a powerful role in shaping who we become. Early events impact the way we think, what we believe about ourselves and others, how we manage stress, and how we form relationships. Researchers have identified both adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) and positive childhood experiences (PCEs) that impact adult mental health.
Hearing about the ACEs can bring mixed reactions, such as validation and guilt. The PCEs are equally important, though, and they focus on what you can do today to build resilience and connection in your family.
What Are Adverse Childhood Experiences?
Adverse childhood experiences, or ACEs, are potentially traumatic events that occur in childhood, before the age of 18. If your child has been a client at Ensemble Therapy, you may have filled out or heard of ACEs. It can be a screener that inquires about traumatic childhood events because understanding a family’s history helps us to create the most supportive and personalized treatment plan possible.
The CDC lists the following as ACEs:
Experiencing violence, abuse, or neglect.
Witnessing violence in the home or community.
Having a family member attempt or die by suicide.
Aspects of the child’s environment that can undermine their sense of safety, stability, and bonding. Examples can include growing up in a household with:
Substance use problems
Mental health problems
Instability due to parental separation
Instability due to household members being in jail or prison
The CDC also notes that this is not a complete list of ACEs and that many other traumatic experiences have the potential to impact one’s mental health.
Knowing about ACEs isn’t meant to scare or shame caregivers. Rather, it’s meant to be empowering. When there is an understanding of how adversity affects a child’s development, we’re better equipped to respond with intention.
What Are Positive Childhood Experiences?
Positive childhood experiences, or PCEs, are moments, relationships, and environments that help children feel secure. These experiences create a strong foundation for resilience, even when adversity is also present in a child’s life.
In 2019, researchers at Johns Hopkins identified 7 PCEs that are linked to positive mental health in adulthood:
Ability to talk with family about feelings
Felt experience that family is supportive in difficult times
Enjoyment in participation in community traditions
Feeling of belonging in high school
Feeling of being supported by friends
Having at least 2 non-parent adults who genuinely care
Feeling safe and protected by an adult at home
These experiences don’t erase adversity when it is also present in a child’s life, but they do give a child internal resources and external support. These experiences help regulate the nervous system, build healthy attachment patterns, and create protective buffers. The wonderful part of PCEs is that they’re rooted in connection, which can be cultivated in small, meaningful ways every day.
How to Foster Positive Childhood Experiences at Home
Learning about ACEs and PCEs can bring mixed reactions and emotions, but you don’t have to be a perfect person from a perfect family to raise a resilient, emotionally healthy child. Here are some practical ways to foster PCEs in your daily routine.
When your child shares about their day, try reflecting their feelings. This will help them to feel understood and supported. If you have trouble getting your child to share about their day, try out some new ways to learn about their day.
To help your child interact with more supportive friends and adults, help them find an extracurricular activity. (Just make sure the hobby is supporting your child’s well-being too.)
Create space for all feelings. You can model that all feelings are okay, but not all behaviors are, with limit setting.
Try validating without fixing. Caregivers have a gut instinct to try to fix anything that is causing distress for their child. Next time your child comes to you with a problem, try responding with, “That sounds really hard.” Being heard and understood is a powerful experience for children.
Building rituals and routines provides predictability and opportunities for connection.
Learning about ACEs and PCEs can be emotional. Remember that while these actions may seem small, they are powerful. Implementing them means you’re creating the conditions for safety and trust to grow.
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WRITTEN BY Rachel Esparza, LPC Associate
Rachel Esparza is a Licensed Professional Counselor Associate supervised by Jaclyn N. Sepp, MA, LPC-S, RPT-S™, NCC, RYT® 200 and Sheila Wessels, MEd, LPC-S, RPT-S™. Rachel is also working towards her Registered Play Therapist™ (RPT™) credential. At Texas State University, Rachel earned her master’s degree in professional counseling (CACREP Accredited Program) and her bachelor’s degree in psychology. She has experience working with children, adolescents, young adults, and families in community counseling settings.
